Before I start I have to say thanks Natalie for another great post. Your posts have a way of making me think.
As I read Natalie's post about envy and the monster in her head I got thinking about some of the monsters in my head. And well sometimes these honest and blunt posts help one think things through. Honest and blunt conversations work to....when done right. Melissa and Annette and I am still grateful to you for teaching me that one....back to the point...today I was thinking about some the monsters I have in my head and ways I manage to get back on course.
The first monster I have is that of envy. I always seem to have away of envying other people and what they have. Every time someone gets married I get envious, at times when I read friends blogs I get envious of the families they are creating. When I read of adventures people have, etc.
The second monster I have is that of mean thoughts about people. When I get mad I judge people. I rarely speak these judgments out loud but I sure think them in my mind. The problem I see and have here is that I am really beginning to hate contention, I seem more and more thinking about how to end it...how to become a peacemaker. Well when I have these thoughts...well and conversations in my mind I have a hard time treating the person I judge kindly, I lose patience and things go down hill fast.
The final monster I have is one I cant really name. I get extremely frustrated and mad when people give advice. I get frustrated when people ask why I am still living at home, try to advice me on what to do about work, dating, etc. The frustration lies in the fact that I know what is best for me, I know what is going in my life and only me and heavenly father can make these decisions.
So how have I tried to stay the course. That one is simple in thought but sometimes harder in application.
Step one: I try to remind myself that we are all individuals. We each make our own decision and live our own lives. We each have our own desires and dreams. To some high paying jobs and a life of luxry. Along with being our own people with our own desires we are each individuals and with that we bring our own levels of abilities... to some its easier to be kind and gentle and easily see the needs of others and live a selfish life. To others they are more driven by the need for recognition, are less kind and are the more high and mighty (Ok you can some judgements coming out...but the point I am making is where are all diferent and we have to learn to love others for what they are able to bring)
Step Two: With recognizing we are all individuals we have to learn to let their opinions and advice bounce off of us. I always have to try and remind my self that I know my life and know my course and desires.
Step Three: This is the one that can be the hardest at times but the most benifical...recognizing that Heavenly Father has a course for each of us. He knows our hearts, our desires, our situations and our frustrations. He loves us and wants the best for us. He has a plan and all things are accomplished in his timing and we can not judge ourselves based on where others are.
Gwen's Star Raising
10 years ago
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